Cassy’s Corner- Emotions and What do They do to Our Writing? A Tribute to a Friend
Last week I received an email from my husband’s business partner. He’s a dear friend. His dog died the evening before. We knew she had cancer, but we weren’t prepared for her rapid decline. Jon’s partner and I spent time together on the phone, both of us in tears. I’ve known this 10-year old babe since she was too tiny to walk and still had her eyes closed. She is the aunt of our older Golden Retriever, the sister of another friend’s dog, and somehow related to our younger Retriever. It’s all a little incestuous, in a good way.
I cried. Literally I sobbed off and on all morning. Our family gatherings will no longer be the same without Libby. I found the rest of the day to be somehow in gray tones. The weather was absolutely beautiful. Soft breezes, not too warm, a perfect day. But it lost the sense of color for me. I live on a lovely lake with shimmering reflections. Not this day. The lake might have glistened for others, but to me it was dead water. We lost Libby.
Today I’m thinking about this differently. I was at an emotional edge on that day last week. What does that mean when I am writing? How can I take that raw sadness and turn it into words? I spent an hour this morning just listing how I felt and what that would mean if it had been my parent, or my child, or my dear friend. What did my stomach feel like? I had trouble eating my lunch. What were my thoughts? Why was I so upset? What did Libby represent in terms of attachment, family, love? After all, she was a dog….so, what do our animals mean as extensions of ourselves?
I spent a good part of the day pondering. Today, I am better. I still miss her. But, I find myself hugging my two Goldens as soon as I rise.
And, I think today my writing will be just a tad better. A little more of me in it. A little more of honest emotion.
Thank you, Libby.