Monday, May 9, 2011

Liz's Lair: Being Proactive With Your Health...NOT!


I am getting ready to go on my annual girls’ trip with my Bunko Babe friends. Some of you might recall how these women surprised me last Christmas when they dressed up for a picture and labeled themselves the Sangria Sisters. Seems they are a wee bit jealous of my header picture with my M & M Babes!!

Anyway, there will be no writing on this trip. It is simply a fact-gathering research excursion. You see, I get all my good one-liners from these women and they go straight into my books. Granted, all but one is a grandma and one is even a great grandma, but trust me, they can fire off the zingers. We are going to Destin on Friday where we’ve rented a 6 bedroom house with a pool. For 7 glorious days, we rarely do our hair or put on makeup. We do all the cooking and only get dolled up one night for our anniversary dinner at a nice restaurant. Of course, there is one clean-up afternoon for shopping. The entire week is spent eating, sleeping, playing water volley ball, reading, laughing……and DRINKING.

This year there will be lots of frozen margarita swirls, Kahlua cakes, Baileys hot chocolate, wine, homemade sangria, and even alcoholic fudge. I need to use them as guinea pigs since I want to include the recipe in my next book. Didn’t I tell you it was for research?? I’ll bet I can write the whole darn thing off, like the cruise!!)

Anyway, with that trip in mind, I thought it was important to spend a little time with women's health issues. I got this from Margaret Golla, a friend and fellow writer, and I felt it was relevant to remind everyone how important it is to stay on top of your fitness and medical issues. So here it is. You can thank me later for helping you out.

Important Women's Health Issue:

Do you have feelings of inadequacy? Do you suffer from shyness?

Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

Do you suffer exhaustion from the day to day grind?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.

Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything. You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.

Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Margaritas.

Margaritas may not be right for everyone - women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include:
- Dizziness
- Nausea
- Vomiting
- Incarceration
- Erotic lustfulness
- Loss of motor control
- Loss of clothing
- Loss of money
- Loss of virginity
- Table dancing
- Headache
- Dehydration
- Dry mouth
- And a desire to sing Karaoke

WARNINGS:
* The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
* The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
* The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to think you can sing and/or dance.













* The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

Does last year’s Crime Bake and RWA Orlando pop in anyone's mind??.

Please share this with other women who may need Margaritas. Say hey if you are one of these women!! Oh, and next Monday's blog will be an encore presentation since I will be busy taking care of my womanly health issues!!

11 comments:

Kari Lee Townsend said...

LOLOLOL....only you could come up with a post like this, Liz!

I think I took care of my health a little too much this past weekend :-)

Have fun on your trip. That looks like a blast!

Anita Clenney said...

I'm so jealous Liz. I love Destin. That's where Austin's parents go to the beach. They took us when my son was 2 years old. I was pregnant with my daughter and supposed to be on bed rest. The doctor agreed to let me go if I promised to take it easy. It was so gorgeous there. The sand was white and the water green. I hope you have a blast and have lots of healthy "tonics". I know you will. And we want to hear all about it when you get back.

Donna Cummings said...

Ah, Liz, you are too hilarious! I really love the "warnings" about margaritas. LOL

Your trip sounds fantastic and I'm struggling not to be jealous. :) And why am I not surprised at alcoholic fudge? It's such an efficient way to do things!

Have fun! Can't wait to hear the details.

Liz Lipperman said...

Kari, taking care of ourselves should be foremost in our minds. sounds like you did a good thing this weekend!!!

Liz Lipperman said...

I love Destin, too, Anita. We've been there before, but this is a new house. I'll take lots of pictures.

Liz Lipperman said...

Donna, I do believe that's your head in the picture with Pete at Crime Bake. So you can attest to the dancing and singing side effect!!

And don't be jealous. I'll come to NY and we can party sometimes.

magolla said...

Thanks for the shoutout, Liz! Have fun on your trip!

Lindsay said...

I always suspected there was some medicinal properities to margaritas. Must be the worm.

Vicki Batman said...

Girlfriends are each other's psychiatrists! I'd be lost without my annual trip to the Christmas Candlelight Home Tour. Lots of giggles and champagne cocktails on our menu.

You are so much fun!!

Liz Lipperman said...

Thanks, Margaret. I definitely will have fun.

Lindsay, I never thought about that worm!!

And Vicki, you are so right about girlfriends being psychiatrists. What would we do without them?

LynNerd said...

I'm here from Sheri's interview of Kari.
That header photo is hysterically funny. You ladies definitely take the cake for the best header photo. I love this site. Very cool that you all take turns.

Kari, congrats on so many wonderful successes. You are one amazing lady.

I used to love margaritas, especially mango flavored, but I'm allergic to citrus so I'll skip the margaritas and order a bloody mary or a beer instead. Funny, amusing post! Cheers!