Today, I am starting the first chapter of CHICKEN CACCHIA-KILER. I spent a lot of time this weekend writing character profiles and working out plot points, and I’m ready to take the plunge. But not before I have a little fun. Not too long ago I ran across this website and had a good laugh. (And this one.) It lists a lot of the words commonly mispronounced—words that make people think of Archie Bunker and his outrageously funny mispronunciations. My favorite one was when he referred to Edith’s doctor as a grinocologist. Anyway, I decided to list a few of the ones I found out there and see how many more we can come up with. I know this has nothing to do with writing, but stay with me. You may find out, like me, you’ve been saying words incorrectly.
anyway –it’s anyway—not anyways
arctic – Note the C after the R. Say /ARK-TIK/, not /ar-tik/.
accessory – the first C has a “hard” sound. Say /AK-SESS-OR-Y/, not /ass-ess-or-y/.
asterisk – Notice the second S. Say /AS-TER-ISK/, not /as-ter-ik/.
athlete -- It’s ath-lete, not ath-a-lete.
barbed wire- Notice the AR in the first syllable. Say /BARBD/, not /bob/.
cache – The word is of French origin, but it does not end with an accented syllable. A cache is a hiding place or something that is being hidden: a cache of supplies; a cache of money; a cache of drugs. Say /KASH/, not /ka-shay/. Crap!This is one of mine.
candidate – Notice the first d. Say /KAN-DI-DATE/, not /kan-i-date/.
cavalry – This word refers to troops that fight on horseback. Say /KAV-UL-RY/, not /kal-vuh-ry/. NOTE: Calvary refers the place where Jesus was crucified and IS pronounced /kal-vuh-ry/.)
drowned – This is the past participle form of the verb drown. Notice that there is no D on drown. Don’t add one when using the word in its past form. Say /DROWND/, not /drown-ded/.
Espresso – say ess-presso, not ex-presso.
February – Don’t say feb-u-ary. It’s Feb-ru-ary.
Nuclear – don’t say nuke-you-ler. It’s pronounced exactly how it’s written – nuc-clee-er.
Prerogative – say pre-rog-ative, not purr-rogative. Oh boy, another one I mess up.
Sherbet – not sher-bert, but sher bet. Yikes!!
And did you know the phrase spitting image actually is spit and image. We shorten it.
And then there’s the redneck’s dictionary.
BARD - verb. Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."
Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."
JAWJUH - noun. A highly flammable state just north of Florida.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjah bard my pickup truck."
MUNTS - noun. A calendar division.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I aint herd from him in munts."
IGNERT - adjective. Not smart. See "Auburn Alumni."
Usage: "Them N-C-TWO-A boys sure are ignert!"
Seriously, folks, I know we can come up with a lot more of these. I have one that my husband uses all the time. It drives me up a freakin’ wall. He combines flustered and frustrated and says flustrated.!! Can you say nails on a chalkboard??
Let’s hear some of yours.